Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adoption. Show all posts

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Why are we adopting?

I know everyone has a story of how they came to the point of adoption. I have never really shared how the Lord worked to get us here. How he "opened our eyes".

Well, here it is....

This whole journey started for us the Summer of 2009. We were pregnant with our third child and after already being blessed with two boys I had been diligently praying for a baby girl.

Let me back up and fill you in on something big that was going on in
my families life at this time. Our sister and brother-in-law, Joel and Mea, had already traveled to Russia and were now just waiting to return to pick up their son whom they would call Weston. The anticipation of his homecoming was growing daily and we were so excited to meet him and welcome him into our family.

The day came for us to find out what our baby was going to be. So on May 22nd as I lay there in the ultrasound room surrounded by family we were told we were having another boy. I was shocked and disappointed as I began to cry. I didn't understand why God couldn't of just given me a girl. Guilt flooded over me as I was so emotional that I could not control my tears. So many people long for one baby and here I had been blessed once again with another healthy baby. As I left the room I met Dr. Bethel, my ob/gyn, in the hall. I tearfully shared our news with her and her immediate response was "well, you'll just have to adopt you a girl". The statement kinda caught me off guard but I didn't think much about it.

The drive home was pretty quiet as I thought about the fact that God knew the deep desire in my heart for a girl, a desire which I believed was put there by him, and had chosen to not give her to me. In that I knew that his thoughts and ways are bigger than ours and that I could trust his perfect plan for giving us another boy and I clung to that to heal my saddened heart.

Later that month I attended a baby shower honoring Mea which was given by her friend Tiffany. Tiffany had three biological sons and the year before had adopted a beautiful little girl from Russia. I couldn't help but think to myself that this could someday be our family. Also, Mea's friend Christine was proudly showing off pictures of her two month old daughter Halina who she would be traveling to pick up in a couple of months from Ethiopia(they also used AGCI). From that day on adoption was never far from my mind.

Mea and Joel traveled to Russia to pick up Weston in the middle of June. We all gathered at the airport to welcome them home and to meet Weston for the first time. It was amazing to see this one year old little boy who not only days before lived in an orphanage with thirty-three other infants. God had specifically picked him to be a part of this family and the funny thing was he didn't even realize his life had been forever changed.

Over the next month I had several conversations with Mea about their journey to Weston and the thoughts I had been having about adopting. I talked to Dillon, my husband, about what he thought about adoption and if he would ever consider it. He told me he had never really thought about it, and we left it at that.

On July 20th, Mea sent me a you tube video of a family who had recently adopted a little girl from Ethiopia. She attached a note saying "if you are not thinking Ethiopia, then watch this". We had been talking the day before about her friend Christine and I said if I ever did adopt it would not be from Ethiopia. It's like God said "oh really, let me show you my plan for your life".
As I watched the video and read the overwhelming facts about the children of Ethiopia and saw the sweet face of Lucy Lane tears streamed down my face. The verse at the end pierced my heart and I knew then that God not only wanted me to adopt but He wanted it to be from Ethiopia. The verse read: "...once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, knows that we know, and holds us responsible to act...Proverbs 24:12.

After praying heavily for a few days over this life changing calling God had placed on my heart I decided it was time to talk to Dillon. I poured out my heart to him and asked him to pray about it. He was very shocked and scared and I'm sure quite overwhelmed by all that I had shared with him but he promised me he would pray about it. We also began to pray about it together and really dug into God's word to see what he would say.

Dillon never got to excited about it or entertained the idea much because he never wanted me to think we were going to do it unless he was totally for sure it was God's will for our family. This ironically brought some anxiety for me. I definitely wanted God to speak directly to Dillon and it never to be something I talked him into but at the same time it was very hard to wait for His answer. I began to doubt and to wonder if this was not God's plan and it was me trying to fulfill my own desires.

God unexpectedly reassured my heart one day in Target and it came from the sweet face of Halina. Carl and Christine had just returned home the evening before from Ethiopia. Christine was making a quick stop into the store and I know God arranged our meeting that day. In that moment of seeing Halina and Christine sharing about their trip it was like God whispered "This WILL be you, and I WILL take care of it". I went out to the car and just cried and thanked God for being so good and faithful.

Time went by and our oldest son Conner started Pre-K and we were getting excited about baby Deacons arrival. I thought about the adoption everyday and wondered how long it would be until God gave Dillon our answer.

On September 6th, a Sunday morning, Dil woke me and excitedly hurried me into the living room and said he wanted to show me something. We sat on the couch together and he placed his commentary in my hands as he held his Bible in his. He said that the night before he had been studying his Sunday school lesson which was in Mark. He said he read on a little further and came to Mark 9:33-37. He began to read these verses to me and when he came to verse 36 and it mentions Jesus taking a child in his arms my eyes began to fill with tears and I knew God had given Dil our answer and it was YES, adoption was his plan for our family. Dil said he felt God speaking to him through these verses and he asked God to confirm whether it was Him or not. He opened his commentary and it said that the Bible only mentions Jesus taking the little child in his arms in the book of Mark. Right specifically where he was reading. At that point he knew that God had confirmed what He had laid on my heart to his heart through the Word. I said "so what you are saying is we are going to adopt a baby girl from Ethiopia" and he said "Yes". We hugged and of course I cried. What a moment, a moment that would change our lives forever.

A few days after our BIG decision!!

Monday, September 13, 2010

What now?

Let me just say that getting placed on the wait list was such an AMAZING feeling! I know it may sound strange to some but it was just as exciting and thrilling as getting a positive pregnancy test. :)

So what do we do now?

We wait and then we wait some more. 12-18 months. It seems like forever but I know the time will fly by. It always does. But when I think about it I kind of have mixed emotions. I want the wait to go by fast because my heart longs for my sweet girl but on the other hand I don't want to wish away a year of my boys lives.

I have been praying that the Lord would just help me to be content in the wait. To have a peace of mind and to wait patiently in Him. I am also asking Him to show me how I can serve Him while I wait. I know above all, my biggest calling at this point, is my boys. To daily teach them by example and guide them as God molds their little hearts. I know that the only way I can do that is to be totally saturated with God's word and on my knees praying.

I am not a morning person(right there with ya Alison *wink*) and it is sometimes hard to find time once the boys are awake to spend time alone with God. I know it is essential tho. If you start your day without it it's like going to battle without any weapons...it's gonna be hard to have a victorious day with nothing to fight off Satan's attacks. So, I am gonna work on being the best me I can be and that is someone who is daily surrendering myself to our sweet Lord and saying yes to what He has for me that day. I am such a work in progress...so thankful I serve a God who loves me so much that He never gives up on me!!!

I know as time goes by I will start to feel the effects of the long wait but right now I am feeling good. We are just so happy to be where we are at this point. Number 90!! That's a big number!! But we are just thrilled to have it!!



Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Ready or not?

Our social worker said that if everything lines up just PERFECT that our home study might be totally finished on Thursday. I would actually have to go pick it up from her house, which is only like an hour away, and immediately ship it overnight to AGCI.

I am trying to not get my hopes up. I have said all along that I thought it would take a miracle for our dossier to get there by Friday. If it is not there by this Friday at least we know it will for sure be there and ready for review next Friday.

Either way, it is fine. I am just glad to finally see some light at the end of the tunnel of paperwork madness.

I am resting in the fact that it is all in God's hands and the difference of this week and next could be the difference in what child we will be matched with. I already know that God has a perfect SPECIFIC baby girl for us so I will trust that His timing is best!!

Will we have a number this week...maybe, maybe not...only God knows!! :)

Friday, August 27, 2010

Home study!!

I finally got the email I have been waiting all week for. Honestly I bet I have checked my email a million times. I am so not good at waiting. Guess I better get used to it, huh?

It was from our social worker and she has finished our home study and emailed it to All God's Children for review!!!!

YAAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!! Happy dance!! I am so pumped!!

She also mailed it out to us and it should be here Monday. We will review it and make any needed changes.

Once she gets AGCI's approval(usually takes around a week) and ours she said it would take her a couple days to get it all finished up. She will then mail it to us and we will make three copies and mail it along with the rest of our dossier paperwork to AGCI.

At that point if everything is good with the dossier we will be put on the wait list!! Oh, how I can't wait for that day!! Please be praying that there is no revisions needed!!

For those of you who have been through this before or just know the process...do they only review dossiers on Fridays? I thought I read this somewhere but I'm not sure.

If that is the case then I am thinking they will probably review our dossier in 2 weeks from today. We are getting closer!! :)

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Ethiopian Fellowship Group

We had the most amazing time last nite meeting lots of new families and watching all the little Ethiopian cuties running around. There was a group of around 15 or so families there. Some had already brought their children home and some were in the process.

My favorite part was being able to meet my blog friend Joely. She was just as sweet as I imagined her to be and our husbands really seemed to hit it off too...


Look forward to getting to know them better and hopefully meeting up with her life long friend Hilary soon!!

I was rather surprised at how yummy the food was. I have to admit that I was a little nervous with the picky eaters in my family. Conner giving his sign of approval...


We ordered The Queen of Sheba for 3 which was a little of everything...


I loved visiting with all the ladies and hearing each of their stories and how God had worked in each situation. Sooo encouraging!!

The kids were all BEAUTIFUL!! These sweet girls took a liking to Dillon...


And this little girl absolutely stole my heart...



Such a blessing to be a part of a group like this!! Can't wait to go back!!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

My faithful companion + GIVE AWAY

If you have seen me in the last couple of months you might also have seen this...



I am not a very organized type of person so I had to run out and get me an expand a file before I started this crazy paperchase. It has been great and has been with me through it all. To the post office, bank, doctor's office, and even the state capital.

So, yesterday I was so excited to slide our LAST document for our dossier into the FINISHED file!!

WaaaaHoooo!! Very glad to have that done!!

I have looked over everything several times and hope and pray that it is all complete and accurate. I am hoping that when we get to send it in that there won't be any revisions but I am expecting there will be. Hope for the best and expect the worse, right?!?!

I talked to our social worker yesterday and she said that we are #2 on her list of cases to write up. She hopes to start working on it this week and email me the first draft next week!!!

We are getting so close to that wait list!!!

If you are anything like me you love a great adoption t-shirt!! First of all, nothing is as comfortable as a t-shirt and it is such a great conversation starter.

I saw this one yesterday and LOVED it....



Head on over to the Dockery family blog and see how you can get your hands on one. You will be blessed by this family and how they are living out God's calling on their life in more ways than one!!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Deacon, the doctor, and difficulties!

Conner and Tucker are back today after spending the last two nights with my parents. My mom wanted to spend some time with them before Con man goes back to school. I missed them so much and it was soooo quiet and actually rather boring around here. It was also great to spend some alone time with this little guy...



He turned 10 months old today...he is an absolute joy in my life and I couldn't love him more. I was very thankful for the time we got to spend just me and him. :)

We got our medical exams done this week. Tests on Monday and results and physicals on Wednesday. Everything was good!!



I think Dil is a little zapped from how terribly HOT it has been here...



Well, I had been hearing rumors that the time line from wait list to referral was going up. Sadly enough, I emailed my CW and she said it was true. She said we should now expect to wait 12-18 months but with everything always changing that we needed to just hold loosely to these numbers.

This news was very hard for me to hear. I have been kinda emotional about it. I was getting so excited thinking that I could possibly see our daughters face within a year. Now it could be up to a year and a half. Wow, that really stinks!!

I fought back tears the whole time I was at church last nite but I left encouraged. The message was just what I needed to hear. Thru the book of Nehemiah our pastor shared with us that....

God does amazing things in the most impossible of circumstances.

Since God called us to adopt thru Ethiopia alot has changed:

one trip became two trips
$24,ooo became $30,000
9-12 months became 12-18 months

When I think about these things I sometimes become frustrated and heavy hearted that everything has become more difficult. I wonder why the process takes so long and costs so much money and so much has to go into it. Why God can't just make it easier.

Maybe he doesn't want it to be easy. Maybe he knows that when things are easy and going smooth that I rely on myself more than Him.

I know that even though this is hard and at times emotionally draining that it is absolutely worth it. It drives me to prayer and a closer relationship with Christ. It keeps my eyes on Him and reminds me that my life is totally out of my hands and whatever He wants to happen will happen. And I can trust that it will be for my good.

Impossible circumstances? Maybe. Impossible for God? Definitely not!!

I know that He loves our baby girl more than we do and in His perfect timing He will bring her home to us.

And looking at them Jesus said to them, "With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26

Saturday, August 7, 2010

home study visit




Our social worker E came out today for our home study. She was so great!! Very easy to talk to...the sweet grandma type. The kids were good. Conner of course had to be funny...

E: Conner, so you are the oldest, right?
Con: Yes, and the awesomest!!(is that even a word) LOL!!!

I told her she must not forget to add HUMBLE as one of the words to describe our sweet boy. :)

Tuck was a little shy...I totally expected this. He answered her questions with a little help from mama and daddy. Even though he handled one question totally on his own...

E: Tucker, what are you going to name your baby?
Tuck: Buster!!!....not sure where that came from.

Deacon was his usual smiley self...LOVE that precious boy!!!

The boys played the rest of the time while we talked with E. We got to share all about ourselves which was right up my alley but probably not so comfortable for my husband. In case you didn't know, I am the outgoing talker and he tends to be more laid back. It works out great. :)

We talked for nearly 2 hours and I gave her a quick tour of the house(she basically just glanced in each room). She told me the home study would be ready for review in around 2 1/2 weeks. Yay!!

Very glad to have this part over with and so glad it forced us to get some things done around here that we had beed putting off for way too long!!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

dossier and homestudy update!

I have actually been surprised on how quickly this is all coming together. It hasn't been near as hard as I thought it would be. I just pray that the Lord continues to go before us on each piece of paperwork.

We have already completed:

power of attorney forms
statement of reason to adopt
photos of family
photos of house
employment letters for both of us(yes, you have to do one even if you are a stay at home mom)
birth certificates for both
marrige license
obligation of post placement report

Need to complete:

photocopy of passports for both w/ notary sheet
medical letters(going in for TB test on Monday...get results and exams Wednesday)
financial statement(notary accidently messed up this one...have to redo)
police clearance for both(supposed to be ready tomorrow..believe that when I see it)
two letters of reference(both said they would be ready by Wednesday)

To my delight, my case worker called Tuesday and asked if we were available for this Saturday!! Yes, Yes, Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wasn't expecting her for a couple weeks!!!

This whole process is amazing and the thrill I get when I check one more thing off our list is sooo great!!

My goal is to have all our paperwork for the dossier done by next week...hopefully Wednesday. Then we will just be waiting on E to type up our home study. Thinking that will take a couple weeks.

My goal when we started was to be on the waitlist by Thanksgiving. Now I am thinking it will be next month. You never know, if everything goes smoothly and no revisions have to be made on anything, we could POSSIBLY be on the waitlist this month!!! That would be CrAzY!!!!!!

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us. Ephesians 3:20

Here are my three little guys yesterday outside the capital building...only took 5 quick minutes to get the POA state certified.....

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Let's Do This!

I'm taking you back to a couple weeks before we sent in our application to AGCI. It had been around 10 months since we knew for sure that God wanted us to adopt. The time came for us to finally be able to get started. What do you suppose happened? Satan set out to cloud my mind with lies.

Doubt. Fear. Uncertainty. Anxiety.

I had thought about the adoption everyday for almost a year. I had longed for the day to send in our application. We had never been so certain and so confident about anything before. Without a doubt, we knew this was GOD'S plan for us. We were ready to take the leap of faith and trust Him all the way no matter the cost.

Satan did not want us to follow thru. He did not want another orphan to have a home and he for sure didn't want God to get all the glory. Isn't he such a LOSER!!!

Well, God proved himself AMAZING yet again.

I was watching a Beth Moore video online and she was talking about how to know God's will in the gray areas of your life. I began to pray afterward and to pour out my heart. I told the Lord I was willing to do whatever He wanted. Whether it be to go ahead with the adoption, not go ahead, or wait. I told Him I needed to know for sure one last time what he wanted of us.

My Bible that I always use was in the other room so I grabbed a study Bible by my bed. I randomly opened it and started reading...

But now, thus says the Lord, your Creator, O Jacob, and He who formed you, O Israel, "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine!

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, nor will the flame burn you.

For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I have given Egypt as your ransom, Cush and Seba in your place. Since you are honored and I love you, I will give other men in your place and other peoples in exchange for your
life.

Do not fear, for I am with you; I will bring your offspring from the east, and gather you from the west. I will say to the north, 'Give them up!' and to the south 'Do not hold them back.' Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth."

Isaiah 43:1-6

In that moment, alone with God, I was totally overwhelmed with His goodness. His love for me. His willingness to show me, once again, what He had already showed me time and time before. All because I needed it.

That was it for me. I honestly said out loud "Ok Lord, let's do this!"

We sent in the application and have never looked back!!!!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Bye Bye workbook...I won't miss you while you are gone!!

WaaaaaaaaaHoooooooo!!!!! We mailed in our With Eyes Wide Open workbook today and emailed all our certificates from our online classes!! So glad to be done!!

I also mailed in our last bunch of paperwork for our home study. Our social worker should be coming out for her a visit in 2-3 weeks...better start cleaning now!!!!

Our case worker called today. I absolutely love the people at AGCI!! They are so friendly!! :) She said to start working on our dossier. For me, this step makes the process seem so real. No more talking about it and waiting to do it...it is here!! I am so excited and so thankful to our Heavenly Father for walking ever step of the way with us!!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Education Overload!!

We had our dossier run-thru call on Wednesday. Our case worker B told us our first priorities are the home study and adoption education. Not even to think about our dossier until we get it done. BUMMER!!!!

We are already done with our home study paperwork and have received our results from our criminal checks and child neglect requests.

So, the only thing standing in my way is that stinkin' workbook and 10 hours of online classes. I definitely enjoy the online classes better than the workbook. The hubbie and I got a kick out of some of the sarcastic answers you could use for intrusive comments about the look of your new family.



It has been hard to find time to work on it because we have been in VBS every nite this week. The kiddos had a blast and learned alot!



Well, I guess it's back to work. Please pray that we will finish the education quickly and efficiently. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!! :)

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The Adoption Planner is here!!!

I actually expected it yesterday and then when it hadn't showed up by 4 o'clock today I was starting to wonder. I text my sister, who lives right down from us, and asked her if it was on her porch by any chance. It was!!!

Deacon was in his highchair eating a snack but I just had to get my hands on that package. So, I sent the boys off with their wagon to retrieve the much anticipated box.

Here they are on their way back. Notice the apple in their hand...Aunt Ang hooked 'em up with a snack...she's the best!!!





My boys ROCK!!!

I am looking forward to our dossier run-thru call tomorrow. She is supposed to go over the quickest and most efficient way to tackle this beast. Then it is go time!!

I will say, I couldn't believe how thick that workbook was...I'm sure it is full of great stuff tho. :)

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Why Something Beautiful?

It is actually the name of a song(the one playing right now as you read this). My husband came home from work one day and said there was this song that he loved that made him think about the adoption. I listened to it and was immediately hooked.

Something Beautiful.

The song is not really about adoption but it touched our hearts just the same.

I am not sure what our childs story will be...why she will become an orphan. What her birthmother will go thru...the pain she will endure having to give her precious little one away. But I know this...

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted; And saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

I pray this verse for this woman and that she will find peace knowing her child will be loved and taken care of.

I know that God planted adoption in my heart at a specific time. That every step of this journey is in His perfect timing. The perfect timing that will lead us exactly to the child he wants us to have. He has it all worked out. He is writing this story. We are just along for the ride.

Only God can take a situation that seems so hopeless and so broken and turn it into SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL!!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

orientation call

We had our orientation phone call today. It was alot of information. It was good to talk about some of the questions we had and just to get more of an understanding of the whole process.

So, first thing in the morning me and the boys are heading to the bank. Thankfully, one of my fave ladies that works there is a notary. I'm sure we will become good friends. :) Then we will be off to the post office to mail in our contracts!!!

I cannot wait to get our adoption planner in the mail and start working on our dossier. The whole thing is a little intimidating to me. I know with the Lord's help and the agencies guidance we will make it through.

WooooHoooo...let the fun begin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Approved!!

There were several celebration dances that went on in our house today...we have been officially approved by AGCI!!!! It is exactly 10 months from the day that God united mine and Dillon's hearts about adoption...God is so awesome!! :)

Tiffany is going to send out our orientation packet tomorrow and our orientation phone call is scheduled for next Tuesday. It's hard to believe this is really happening!!

The most exciting part of the day was finally getting to tell the boys! It didn't go exactly how I imagined but what do you expect with a 6 year old comedian at the table. :)

Dillon started by asking what they thought about the empty chair at the dinner table and what they thought about filling it with someone. Conner says he has a great idea and immediately runs out of the room and returns with this.....


"Big George"...the first thing Dil ever bought me when we were dating. Like I said...not exactly how I imagined it!! :)

Dil opened his Bible and read Mark 9:36, which is the verse that the Lord used to speak to him about His plan for our family. We discussed God's love for us and what He did for us on the cross and how we are supposed to share that love with other people. We explained to them how God had spoken to our hearts and told us He wanted us to adopt a baby and that they are going to get a sister. There faces filled with excitement!!

Me: Con, where do you think she is going to be from?
Con: I don't know, where?
Me: Where is mommies favorite place?
Con: Ethiopia!!

He of course told me he wanted her to be from Russia. I knew that was coming. Weston, our adorable nephew, was adopted from there last summer. Oh, how we love that boy!! :)

After we ended our talk I asked them what they thought about getting a sister...



Conner: Totally awesome!!
Tucker: Great!!

I love those boys!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

My most exciting trip to the post office!!




I drove to the post office today. I sat in the car for a minute and looked at the other people in the parking lot. I was sure they were gonna think I was a little crazy for taking pics of my kiddos holding an oversized envelope. That thought quickly passed...I simply didn't care. This was a big day for us...one we had been waiting on for almost 10 months. We were finally sending off our application to All God's Children. We were taking the first big step on our adoption journey and we couldn't be more excited...I can't wait to see what God has in store for us!!!!!

(Jesus) took a little child and had him stand among them. Taking him in His arms, He said to them, "Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me..." Mark 9:36, 37